The Love Letter
by katalina42
Summary: Kaoru finds a love letter in her laundry. Could it be from Kenshin? Kenshin and his friends find themselves in a series of unfortunately crazy events as the love is passed around. Reviews appreciated!
1. Chapter I

**Chapter I**

**Kaoru receives a letter**

"Hey ugly!"

Kaoru stiffened at Yahiko's favorite nickname for her.

"Kenshin said the laundry's done and that he just went to town to pick up some stuff for dinner. He prepared the bath too." Yahiko looked her up and down, raised his eyebrow and snickered. "You sure need it. I bet he could smell your stinky feet a mile away," he laughed and ran off,

Kaoru growled. If she wasn't so tired from her workout she would have gone after the little monkey and given him a good thrashing. NOBODY messes with a master of the Kamiya Kasshin Ryuu! But as it was, she felt too sore and sweaty and smelly, and actually felt…ugly. She sighed and trudged off to the furo.

She smiled when she saw the laundry folded neatly in a basket. She loved the smell of clean laundry. She picked out the kimono she was going to wear, rubbed her cheek on the soft fabric and took a deep breath. There it was: the smell of fresh lemons, and a dash of rurouni. Kaoru giggled. Kenshin probably didn't realize it, but half the time he smelled like laundry soap. She inhaled again, deeper this time, and caught a faint musky male smell. She imagined it was Kenshin's chest she was nuzzling, his arms around her, his glorious red hair tumbling down his shoulders to –

"Oi, Jou-chan. Breathe any harder and you'll end up with that kimono right up your nose," Sano snickered.

Kaoru blushed and glared at Sano, "Mou! Why don't you just mind your own business? And what are you doing here anyway? It's too early for dinner but too late for lunch so go off and do…whatever it is you do when you're not mooching off us!"

"Now, Jou-chan, that's not nice. Is that any way to speak to a guest – and your elder and better to boot."

"Aaaaa! How can you be better than me?"

"Well, I can definitely cook better than you. And I smell better than you right now too," Sano looked her up and down in the same way Yahiko did and wrinkled his nose. "Yep. Better go and take your bath before Kenshin smells you. He might just decide to turn rurouni again."

"That's just what I was about to do until you interrupted –"

"—your fantasy?"

"What?!"

"Thinking of Kenshin doing your laundry really turns you on, huh? Hehe. Don't try denying it. I saw that look on your face."

"Go away before I MAIM YOU!" Kaoru picked up her wash basin and hurled it at him. Sanosuke dodged and clucked his tongue at her.

"Now, now, Jou-chan. Those monster faces are gonna give you wrinkles and that won't help you at all with Kenshin, will it? See ya at dinner. Take a nice looong bath, okay?" Sano winked at her and walked off, whistling off-key.

Kaoru was ready to go after him with her basin and knock him senseless, and then kick him around just for fun. _Wrinkles? Me? The kenjutsu beauty? And at the ripe young age of 18? How dare he! _But the prospect of Kenshin coming back finding her smelly and muddy with blood on her hands was not the way she wanted to spend the evening. She counted slowly to 100 to curb the bloodlust and slowly unclenched her fists._Mou! I was so angry I wrinkled my kimono! _Kaoru spread out her kimono and tried to smooth out the wrinkles. _That Sanosuke! I'm gonna get him tonight right after I pound Yahiko…Wait, what's this? _

A letter, hidden within the folds of the kimono, fluttered to the ground. Kaoru picked it up. It was not addressed to anyone. She turned over the envelope and found that it wasn't sealed. Curiosity winning over propriety, she pulled out the letter and began to read it. Her eyes widened and a faint blush stained her cheeks. As she read on, the blush deepened until she resembled a cherry tomato…a very happy cherry tomato.

Kaoru quickly gathered her things, dashed to the bathhouse, closed the door behind her, and screamed in delight.

"Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!!!!"

* * *

Yahiko turned sleepy eyes on Sano from his position on the floor. "Do you think we should…?"

Sano was sprawled beneath the shade of a tree, idly chewing a blade of grass. "Hmm? Nah. Bath's probably cold."

"Well, it wasn't a help-me-I'm-being-attacked-by-giant-ticks-that-jumped-out-of-my-hair kind of scream or anything remotely dangerous…"

"Right."

The two looked at each other, shrugged, and went back to their favorite past time of loafing around.

* * *

Kaoru could barely contain her excitement. Kenshin gave her a love letter! Who else could it be from? It was in her LAUNDRY, for crying out loud. And who did the laundry? Kenshin! Who was the only other person who had access to her clothes [doesn't that sound kinky? ;) ? Kenshin! And who among all the males in her house could actually have the imagination to describe her in such wonderful, flattering detail? (come on everyone, join in the chorus!) Who else but…Kenshin!

"Thank you, thank you, THANK YOU Kami-sama, for hearing my prayers and for FINALLY making him do something! Oh, I'm so thrilled! I'm going to wear the kimono he hid it in so he'll know I received it. I can't wait until dinner!" Kaoru's eyes sparkled, and despite her still dirty, disheveled appearance, her joy definitely made her the prettiest little kenjutsu in Japan that day.

She took special care in the bath, scrubbing until her skin was as "white and flawless as a pearl in its perfection". She brushed her hair until it shone and was "softer than the finest silk". She blushed at the beautiful poetry Kenshin wrote in tribute to her beauty. And now she understood why it took so long for Kenshin to declare himself. It was because he was rendered "speechless in the face of your beauty, fire and spirit." Of course he was! The poor dear. She should have taken matters into her own hands long ago and maybe by now he wouldn't have to resort to sneaking around, hiding letters in her laundry! Though it was definitely so _nice_ to receive a love letter.

"Tadaima!"

Kaoru gasped and dropped her brush. Kenshin was home. "Oh, how am I going to face him?" Now that she had proof of his feelings for her, she wasn't entirely sure what she was going to do.

"Hey Jou-chan! Food's ready!"

"Yeah! Hurry before rooster head here eats it all up!"

"You're the one stuffing your ugly face!"

Kaoru ignored the scuffle that ensued outside and took a few deep breaths to center herself. Then she realized that she didn't want those two bakas ruining her wonderful evening with their yelling and fighting. She quickly stood up, wondering how she could stop them from fighting without having to be the "violent tanuki girl". That was NOT part of her image…for that evening anyway.

"Sano!" she called.

"What?" he rudely shouted back.

"Come here please. I have a favor to ask of you. Onegai."

Sano was about to shout back, "Do it yourself!" when the use of the word "please" twice in one sentence from Kaoru caught his attention. Besides, the food fight was getting boring. There was almost no more food to fight over, and it was too hot to get too worked up anyway. He ambled towards Kaoru. He was surprised to see her all dressed up. He raised his eyebrows and whistled, "You got a date or something?"

She blushed and handed a package to him. "I promised Tae-san that she would have this before sunset. It's really important. I'd go myself but it's getting dark. Besides, I know you've eaten already. Please."

There it was again. "Three "pleases" in one night. Well, it really must be important. And if you weren't looking like such a girl maybe I would have thought twice," he winked at her. Kaoru gave him a dazzling smile._ You know, she really is pretty…when she isn't pounding someone's face into the ground. _

"Arigato gozaimasu, Sano. I'll save some dessert for you!" She bowed and went to the dining room. As she rushed past, he caught sight of an envelope on the floor. He turned to call her but she was already gone. He shrugged and picked it up. _It's probably for Tae-san. _It had no name, though. _Well, I better open it to make sure. _

Sanosuke nearly dropped the package on reading the contents of the letter._This is definitely NOT for Tae-san. _He sweatdropped. _Then who is it for? _His eyes grew wide. _Could it be that she meant for me to find it…and…she…loves…me? _Sanosuke's heart clenched. _Oh boy. Kenshin's gonna kill me._

**End of Chapter I.**_  
_


	2. Chapter II

**Chapter II**

**In which Kenshin and Kaoru have dinner**

Kaoru paused outside the dining room. She had gotten rid of Sano. Now how to get rid of Yahiko?

"Yahiko, slow down. You might choke on something."

"Well who knows when that Rooster-Head will come barging in here trying to grab my food?" _chewchewgulpgulpswallowchewswallowchewgulp_

Kaoru heard Kenshin sigh over the sounds of Yahiko devouring his food. "Well, make sure you leave some for Kaoru-dono. And please try not to choke."

"Sure."_gulp chew gulp glubglubGLUB…aah_ "Well, I'm all done. Gotta run, Kenshin. I promised Tsuba- I mean, Tae-san that I'd help out at the restaurant tonight. Ja ne! Don't wait up for me." Yahiko pushed open the door and nearly ran over Kaoru. "Hey, what're you doing standing outside? Food's getting cold." He was about to run off when he stopped, looked her up and down, and snickered, "You got a date? Hey Kenshin, I think Kaoru's got a date!"

"Oro?"

"No I do not!" Kaoru's eyes flickered towards Kenshin. "Well…not really…"

Yahiko snorted. "Figures. Who'd want to go out with an old hag like you?"

Kaoru's fists clenched, "You better leave NOW Yahiko-CHAN or all Tsubame's going to see of you tonight will be able to fit in a little box delivered to the doorstep of the Akabeko!"

"I'm NOT a CHAN! I'm outta here. Have fun on your DATE," Yahiko winked at her suggestively and walked towards the restaurant.

"Are you going out Kaoru-dono?"

Kaoru jumped, Kenshin's voice as effective as cold water to her sizzling temper. "N-no…" _I'm ALONE with Kenshin! I'm actually alone with him. Oh, kami-sama, give me strength…_ Kaoru, drew herself up and tried to remember everything that Megumi and Tae had told her about Wrapping a Man Around One's Tiny Finger. "I just wanted to dress up for dinner. Don't you think this kimono is lovely?" She put some swing to her hips as she walked slowly towards him.

Kenshin's eyes followed the entrancing movement of her body. Kaoru felt her cheeks blush slightly as he looked at her, embarassed yet pleased that The Walk that Megumi painstakingly taught her seemed to be taking it's effect.

"Are you alright Kaoru-dono? You seem to be walking funny. Is there something wrong with your hips?" Kenshin tilted his head to the side, scrutinizing the lower half of her body.

Kaoru stumbled and caught herself at the last minute. "There is NOTHING wrong with my hips!" she said through gritted teeth.

"Gomen, gomen…your feet maybe?"

"NO."

"You're sure? Maybe we should call Megumi and have her take a look at you because--"

"NO! I said I'm alright," Kaoru dropped the Damn Walk and practically stomped to her place beside Kenshin. She nearly broke her chopsticks in half in frustration. _Remember Kaoru. Lesson Number 1: Violence won't get you anywhere. Breathe in. Breathe out. You are a flower opening up to the sun. Not a shinai-wielding-man-killing-monster-from-hell – no matter how much you'd like to be one. This is Kenshin. Remember the letter…_

Kaoru ate in silence while Kenshin uncharacteristically chattered away. Kaoru's strange behavior made him very nervous. He felt as if he was on a hunt…and he was the prey. He observed Kaoru as he talked about the most inane topics, his keen eye catching the flush of her cheeks and the thread of amber that suddenly flashed in her eyes. He gulped. Why does she remind me of the Battousai? He was considering the wisdom of suggesting an appointment with Megumi again. Then Kaoru started doing strange things to her lips.

* * *

_Tae and Megumi's__Wrapping A Man Around One's Tiny Finger Lesson Number 9:_

_Draw attention to your lips._

* * *

Kaoru knew her lips were one of her best assets. And since they were kneeling down and eating, it was the perfect opportunity to apply Lesson Number 9. She sucked on her sushi, puckering her lips, and turned her face to the side so that Kenshin had a better view. She felt rather stupid, but it seemed to work because Kenshin stopped talking about the increase of the price of fish and, well, stared at her. Not adoringly or passionately like she hoped, but it was a start. 

Kenshin stared at Kaoru. He couldn't help it. _What the HELL is she doing? _his mind screamed. All of a sudden, he didn't want his sushi anymore.

"Kenshin?" Kaoru asked innocently and batted her eyelashes. "Don't you want to eat anymore?"

"Umm…" he twiddled his thumbs and looked nervously at her.

_Is it working? _Kaoru couldn't tell. Well, at least she had his attention. She picked the sushi from her chopsticks with her teeth, sucked it in with her lips, chewed and tried to pout at the same time, swallowed, and smiled.

Kenshin's mouth hung open. Kaoru batted her eyelashes for added effect. "To taste the wine from your rosebud lips. What bliss!" she quoted the letter – his letter – softly, and lowered her eyes to hide her blush.

"What?" Kenshin asked abruptly. _Sucking sushi and cheesy poetry? Kami-sama, she must really be sick! She's delirious!_

"Would you like a taste?" Kaoru blushed even redder at her forwardness. Well, there was no backing down now.

"Umm…demo…I still have some sushi on my plate." Kenshin said uncertainly.

"Silly," Kaoru said "You know what I mean," she leaned closer and fluttered her eyelashes.

* * *

_Tae and Megumi's Wrapping A Man Around One's Tiny Finger Lesson number 6:_

_Your eyes are the windows to your soul._

* * *

Kenshin leaned back as she moved forward, gulped, and said, "Kaoru-dono, is there something in your eye?" 

Surprised, Kaoru jerked back to an upright sitting position. "No. Why?"

"Well…you keep…blinking. I thought something got caught in it."

"Lashes like ribbons of silk that frame your wondrous eyes…"

"Huh?"_What junk has she been reading? _Kaoru blinked – blinked this time, no fluttering – and stared at Kenshin.

_There's something wrong. Demo…I'm doing everything right! And the lines from his poem should…Ah! I understand. My poor Kenshin is still shy. _She smiled fondly at him.

Kenshin watched as Kaoru's expression changed from one of confusion to a slow, wide smile. Somehow, the smile made him even more nervous.

"Oi! Kenshin!"

Kenshin jumped, glad for any excuse to get out of that room, "Sano's back! I'll show him in!" He rushed out of the room.

"But he knows the way in!" Kaoru's protest faded behind him as he ran to the gate –

--and headlong into Sano.

"Woah! Where's the fire?" Sano said to the red haired heap on the floor.

"Oro?" Kenshin shook himself and stood. "No…It's just, Kaoru-dono has been acting strange lately. I really think she should see Megumi-dono but she gets angry every time I suggest it."

"Well, maybe she's got a lot on her mind. Or maybe whatever she has can't be so easily cured, " Sano murmured.

"What do you mean, Sano?" Kenshin asked worriedly, images of Kaoru sucking sushi for the rest of her life flashing in his brain.

"Nothing, nothing!" Sano waved his arms in protest and laughed nervously. He cleared his throat, "Anyway, this is for Jou-chan from Tae-san."

"Uh…why don't you give it to her yourself?" Kenshin thrust the package back at Sano.

Sano sweatdropped, "Well, I – I don't want to disturb her dinner with you." He thrust the package back at Kenshin.

"Since when did that bother you?" Now SANO was acting strange. What was going on? He shoved the package toward Sano's chest. Sano stopped it midway with his hands, causing the package to be suspended between their two opposing forces.

"This is the new, sensitive Sano, okay? From now on I'll stop playing the insensitive Rooster-Head. So have a – GOOD – DINNER!" Sano used the greater strength of his whole body to force the package back at Kenshin, causing the smaller man to fall to the ground, package and all. Sano wasn't able to recover in time and stumbled, landing on top of Kenshin.

"Sano? Kenshin? Is there something wrong?"

Sano and Kenshin looked at each other nervously, "Nope! Everything's fine!" they shouted. They scrambled to their feet and quickly gathered their things.

"I've gotta go. I have to go meet someone. Say good night to Jou-chan for me. Ja!" Sano dusted himself off, hopped over the gate, and was out of sight.

Kenshin sighed. What was wrong with everyone today? Sano all jittery and Kaoru acting like a – well, not acting herself – and spouting poetry. He looked down at the package Tae sent her. There were two letters, one addressed to Kaoru in Tae's precise handwriting. The other was addressed to no one. He looked at it curiously and turned it over in his hands. It was wrinkled and smudged. It couldn't have come from Tae since the hostess was obsessively neat in everything she did. After a moment's hesitation, he put the letter in his pocket. Then he straightened his clothes, took a deep breath, and braced himself for whatever Kaoru was going to throw at him next.

**End Chapter II.**


	3. Chapter III

**Chapter III**

**In which Sano has a dilemma and Kenshin is surprised**

_The next day._

On the rooftop of a run-down apartment, a red rooster was hopping up to the highest peak. His feathers gleamed in the sun as he concentrated on his footing. Higher and higher he went, yellow talons gripping the wooden roof. When he finally reached the roof's edge, the rooster stopped, and like the grandest king, narrowed his bright golden eyes and surveyed the land below him. His kingdom consisted of several other small apartments connected to his, birds perched on clotheslines laden with laundry chattering the day away, dusty roads littered with a few scraps of paper, an empty box or two, and a chewed up pair of boots. The rooster sighed, as if to say, 'well, a king, like a beggar, can't choose his kingdom'. After a final glance at what lay below him, he heaved his chest and let out a proud and mighty crow. It was a Grand Crow, designed to awaken the heaviest sleepers and surge the adrenaline in the laziest of bums. It truly was a wonderful crow.

One important note, however. The rooster was not crowing to signal the coming of dawn. He was crowing in the heat of noon – lunchtime to be exact. He was performing this extra service because he could not stand bums in his little kingdom – especially one who carried the name Rooster Head. He was crowing the equivalent of "GIT YOUR LAZY ASS OUT OF HERE YOU SLACKER ! I DON'T WANT TO SEE NO MORE OF YOU IN HERE, DO YOU HEAR ME?!"

Our Rooster, however, refused to budge.

The crowing woke him, like it did everyday. It was especially loud this time around. It definitely drilled holes into his eardrums. He expected he would hear ringing in his ears the whole day. Sano opened his eyes and greeted the new day with a crisp "Kuso".

Having heard that, the rooster on the roof hopped down to Sano's window and peered in as if to make sure Sano was truly awake. Sano glared at him, heaved himself out of the futon and muttered angrily as he began to get dressed. "You stupid bird! Shit, did you have to crow so loud?!"

The rooster tilted his head and looked at him out of one eye. Sano felt it was saying, "The hell I had to! You were gonna drool on that pillow the whole day if I didn't."

Sano glared even harder at him and tied his bandanna around his head. "Now, not only do I have a hangover, I feel like you drilled a hole into my eardrums. _Che!_ I should just grab you right now and cook you for lunch!" The word lunch set Sano's stomach growling. Startled, Sano and the rooster stared at Sano's stomach. It growled again, louder this time.

The rooster looked from Sano's stomach to Sano's face to Sano's stomach. Then it lifted its wings, flapped down from the window and ran out of sight.

Sano groaned. He felt horrible. Besides his pounding head, his body still felt as if he was pumping sake in his veins instead of blood, his stomach was empty, and he didn't have a cent to his name.

_So what else was new?_ He shrugged. _I'll just hop over to Jou-chan's like I usually do and…_ Sano froze at the doorway. Now he remembered why he drowned himself in sake the night before – something, contrary to what certain doctors think, he rarely did anymore. He was having a Last Drink Before the Gallows sort of thing, or rather before Kenshin found out Jou-chan was in love with him and came to tear him apart limb from limb.

Sano sighed and began to wander, shoulders slumped dejectedly. _Goodbye to freeloading at the Kamiya Dojo. Goodbye to Kenshin's delicious homecooked meals, anyway. Jou-chan, being head over heels in love with me, would probably cook something for me. But that would kill me as surely as if Kenshin stuck his sakabatou through my gut. Sigh._

Sano trudged along to the duet of his dragging footsteps and his rumbling stomach. He tried to ignore his hunger by thinking of something else, and his thoughts naturally drifted to the love letter Kaoru wrote him. What the hell possessed Jou-chan to fall for him? She never seemed interested before. It was always Kenshin this, Kenshin that. Then all of a sudden she writes about his "lashes like ribbons of silk that frame your wondrous eyes. Oh, that you may gaze on me for eternity! That I may drown in those pools and the secrets they hold so that I may see myself as you do!"

How_did_he see her? Sano pictured Kaoru in his mind. A petite, dark-eyed, pretty girl. Hell, he never even consciously thought of her as pretty. She was like his younger sister, and he never thought of her as anything but that. Just plain Jou-chan. Violent, noisy, prissy, laughing…like that afternoon when he accompanied her to the river. Kenshin was late coming home and Yahiko was tired, so Sano agreed to walk with her just so she didn't have to go alone. He didn't want to be the focus of those amber eyes when Kenshin asked for her and found out she walked off alone in the dark. Kaoru was cheerful, picking flowers that she said she planned to use for tea, although Sano knew she was really going to put them on Kenshin's pillow. He didn't tease her, though. He wasn't in the mood. And so she laughed, and teased, and the wind blew her hair so that the ribbon she used to tie it came loose and made her black hair billow around her face like a veil. Her eyes widened as her ribbon flew out of her grasp. Sano reached out and caught it and teased her about being indecent and a mess. Her eyes narrowed as she grabbed it from him, but instead of the scathing reply he expected about the state of his own hair, she laughed instead, picked up her flowers, hitched up her kimono, and shouted that if he didn't catch up to her he'd have to miss dinner. Sano stood and stared at her, bewitched by her spirit and beauty and surprised he never noticed it before. Then Kaoru fell flat on her face. The moment was gone. Sano couldn't help himself. He burst out laughing. Of course the walk ended with his head being pounded to the ground, leaving a permanent indentation on the poor abused earth. And he forgot about ever having thought she was anything other than Jou-chan.

Until now. _Hell…so what if she's pretty? I don't think I can…I mean…she's…argh she's Jou-CHAN!_

"What about Jou-chan, Rooster-head?"

Sano jerked upright and nearly tripped over his feet at the abrupt stop. He was unaware he had spoken aloud, and the person who heard him was the last person he wanted to have overheard his random thoughts. Well…the third to the last anyway. He spun around and came nearly nose to nose with Megumi.

"Sano, why are you all red?"

He looked down to see he had almost walked on top of Suzume, who was holding onto Megumi's kimono. Ayame was clutching Megumi's other hand. All of a sudden Ayame's eyes widened and she laughed in delight. "Sano's blushing! Look! He's blushing coz he thinks Megumi is so pretty! Isn't that right, Suzume?"

Suzume grinned and clapped her hands, "Sano's blushing! Sano's blushing!" she chanted.

"Hey! No, I wasn't blushing! Stop that!" Sano sweatdropped and waved his arms frantically, trying to cover the children's mouths. They were dancing around him and Megumi, though, dodging his attempts to grab them. To his dismay, Sano felt his face getting hotter. He looked at Megumi, trying to appear nonchalant, but her raised eyebrow showed him how much he succeeded. "I wasn't – I'm NOT blushing. I just overexerted myself."

That eyebrow didn't move an inch, "Yeah, Sano. Slouching and dragging your feet AND talking to yourself is very strenuous work." She turned her back on him, "I suppose you're going over to Kaoru's for lunch. I was on my way there myself, to drop off the girls. They want their Ken-nii. As do I," Megumi covered her mouth with her hand and giggled, that giggle.

On normal days, and on a full stomach, Sano would have had an insult ready to throw back at her. But today, he just shrugged and said, "Oh. I'm not going there. Got stuff to do."

Megumi stopped walking and turned back to him, a suspicious look on her face. "Stuff? What stuff?"

"Nothing dangerous, Kitsune baby. Thanks for worrying," Sano winked.

"I wasn't worried about you, rooster brain. I was worried that you'll drag Kenshin into whatever crazy fight you have now."

"Well don't worry about that, either. I won't be bothering Kenshin or Kaoru for awhile."

"Oh really? Then why are you standing in front of the gate to the Dojo?"

"Huh?" Sano glanced up and groaned inwardly. His traitor of a stomach led his feet straight to his death while he was thinking of the damn letter. "I…I was just passing by. My…stuff..is over that way," he pointed vaguely down the road.

That eyebrow went up again. "Well…you still have to eat or you'll lose and Kenshin will go and have to save your sorry behind."

"I got other places to eat," Sano put his hands in his pockets, trying to look casual and full when in fact the word 'eat' was enough to set him reeling.

Megumi looked surprised, "Not unless Tae-san decided to make you eat the humongous tab you have at the Akabeko. The Dojo's the only place you eat for free. And the Akabeko is over THAT way," she pointed in the opposite direction.

"Aw, come on, Kitsune. Just admit you want my company. That's why you're going to eat at the Dojo," Sano grinned. He couldn't resist, even when his life was on the line.

"Wishful thinking, baka. Did you have a fight with Kaoru? Is that why you've been talking to yourself about her?" Megumi placed her hands on her hips, looking as immovable as a rock.

"No!" Sano said indignantly. "It's just that I ate already!" he clenched his teeth as his stomach betrayed him with a loud growl. Ayame and Suzume stopped dancing around them and ran behind Megumi for protection. Megumi looked pointedly at his stomach.

"Come on, baka tori. Apologize to her and get it over with or you'll starve to death." She grabbed his arm and proceeded to drag him towards the Dojo.

"I don't need to apologize for anything! I just…let go of me Megumi! Kuso!"

Megumi twisted his arm, "Not in front of the children. And even if you didn't plan on apologizing, your stomach was definitely leading you in this direction. So if you plan on still having three meals a day…"

"Megumi, don't do this to me. If you do…you're never going to see me alive again," Sano groaned. She had him in a death grip. He could have thrown her if he wanted to, but…he liked her touching him. Even if her nails were painfully digging into his flesh.

Megumi laughed. "Oh, is Kaoru cooking today? I'll fix that. Come on girls. Ken-nii is waiting." And she laughed that laugh. Sano sighed. Somehow, it seemed appropriate that it was the Fox Lady who led him to his death.

* * *

Kenshin paced the length of the training hall. Kaoru was in the kitchen. The gods knew he couldn't work with her in there, not after the dinner the evening before. _I swear if she starts puckering her lips again, I'll end up setting fire to the kitchen! It was difficult enough thinking around her before that. But now…_he shuddered.

Well, he knew one thing for sure. No sushi for lunch – or anytime soon for that matter.

How on earth was he going to get her out of the kitchen? Kaoru was so unpredictable, he was afraid of what she might do…and of how he might respond. Kenshin sighed, leaned against the wall, and sank down to his heels.

And so it was that the greatest swordsman in all of Japan was driven into hiding by a pair of sushi sucking lips.

* * *

Kaoru sighed as she stirred the broth. She came into the kitchen as Kenshin was cooking, hoping to use more of Tae and Megumi's tips on him since the ones she used the evening before seemed to work so well. But as soon as Kenshin laid eyes on her he…squeaked. And then he left her with the task of stirring the broth, muttering something about the laundry. However, when Kaoru glanced out the window she saw that all the laundry was done and hanging out to dry.

She was about to turn back to the broth when a movement caught her eye. She leaned out the window, and was startled by Sano's face appearing out of nowhere.

"Sano?" her eyes opened wide in surprise.

"Uh…hi…Kaoru. Um…"

Kaoru blinked, then tilted her head to the left and looked behind Sano, "Megumi? Why are you twisting Sano's arm like that? And why are you pushing his head towards the kitchen window?"

Megumi grinned. "Oh, Sano just wanted to help you in the kitchen. Isn't that right, girls?"

Kaoru looked down and saw Ayame and Suzume bobbing their heads in agreement. "That's right, Kaoru."

"So, Sano." Megumi and the girls heaved him up the window. "Get…your…butt…in there…NOW!"

"LET GO OF ME!" Sano yelled, flailing his arms.

He fell through the window.

* * *

THUD

"Aaaaaaaaah!"

Kenshin lifted his head from his hands. His violet eyes widened, then narrowed into amber slits.

"Kaoru," he whispered. He got up in one smooth motion and ran towards the kitchen.

* * *

Sano landed on something soft. He didn't want to open his eyes, afraid that the curvaceous cushion he was lying on was what – rather, who – he thought it was.

"Sano? What are you doing?"

Sano's eyes flew open to see Kenshin staring down at him with mostly violet eyes. _Mostly…_

"Well…you seem to be enjoying yourself," Megumi was peering at him through the window. She sniffed disdainfully.

Finally, he looked down at Kaoru's face, so close he could kiss it. He was sprawled on top of her, one hand pinning her shoulder to the ground, the other tangled in her hair.

"It's not what you think!" Sano said desperately and tried to rise. His hand slipped on her hair and he fell back down on top of her.

"Ouch! Get off!"

"I'm trying! You think I actually want to lie on a cow like you?"

Kaoru's eyes turned into fire, "I am nothing at all like a cow! You're lucky to be lying on top of someone as beautiful as me!"

Megumi leaned her elbows on the windowsill, enjoying the show, "Hmm. This is turning out to be interesting."

"What are you talking about?! You're not ---" Sano swallowed. _Kuso. I…I can't say it. Dammit I'm all confused!_

"I'm not what?" Kaoru challenged. Her eyes told him that although she didn't understand why he was hesitating, she understood that somehow she won this round.

Sano growled and said the first thing that came into his mind. "You're not…you're not even gonna make a good Japanese wife! Even I cook better than you!"

Silence.

Megumi coughed.

Kaoru stared at him, stunned.

_Smart move, rooster brain. You are definitely in for a maiming right about now._

As if on cue, Kaoru's battle aura began to flare.

* * *

"Oh! Look here! A letter!" Kenshin cried in a high-pitched, fake cheery voice. Kaoru slowly turned her head towards him. He began to sweat as he felt the heat of her battle aura transfer it's attention on him. When Kaoru wanted to be violent, she didn't appreciate being interrupted.

"It's from Misao-dono! She's coming for a visit. In fact she's on her way right now!" Kenshin waved the letter in front of Kaoru.

Her battle aura abruptly winked out. "Let me see!" Kaoru snatched the letter from his hands. Megumi disappeared from the window, rushed into the kitchen, and pushed him aside.

"Oro?"

THUD

"Gomen, Sano."

"Daijoubu. I'm kinda getting used to it," Sano grunted from under Kenshin.

The two women exclaimed over Misao's letter and the news it contained, oblivious to anything else. Kenshin stood and helped Sano to his feet. As he straightened his kimono, he felt something in his pocket. He pulled it out. It was another letter, dirt-stained and crumpled. Kenshin frowned and stared at it for a few moments. Then his face lit up as he remembered the events of the day before, when Sano…hmm, the package and letter were from Tae-dono for Kaoru-dono. Did Sano mean this letter for me?

Kenshin opened the envelope. He unfolded the letter and began to read.

* * *

The rustling of paper caught Sano's attention. He glanced at Kenshin._Oh. Another letter_. He began to look away when he noticed Kenshin's expression. It was…bewildered…and rather sickly. He looked at the paper Kenshin was holding. It looked familiar somehow…

Sano gasped, "Chikuso…" _No. It can't be._

Kenshin turned his face to look at Sano. Their eyes met.

_Kami-sama. It is._

And the kitchen burst into flame.

**End Chapter III.**


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